Leaving The Military: “So, What’s Next?”

For those of you who have been reading my blog for awhile have probably noticed that I am in the military. Well, that journey is going to come to an end very soon. And in the

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The day I graduated boot camp.

military, there is a process where you have to go all over the base or everywhere in your command/unit to get signatures – check out. You have to literally check out of the military as if you were checking out of a hotel. And everyone you check out with will ask you this question:

“So, what’s next?”

There’s nothing wrong with asking that but that seems to be the question on everyone’s minds when you’re about to separate from the military. And I would always answer them politely, with the same, rehearsed response:

“I’m going to be a mom. Stay home with the kids. Go back to school in a year to finish my degree once we find out where we are going next (husband is remaining active duty ) and maybe pursue personal training.”

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First time on a ship.

I am pretty sure I have said that about 100 times in the past few days. But is that really what I want? I am writing this post after I had a minor panic attack when I sat in my car, thinking about what IS next? I mean, I know I am going to be a stay-at-home-mom for awhile and I am going to take care of the babies. I am going to sleep in when the kids let me and I am going to color my hair purple. I will have more time to write and to keep the house clean! As for the “real” adulting stuff, I am not sure. And then all the questions started to pour in.

Will I ever get a job that pays as much?

Will I ever get another job with the same amount of benefits?

How will my current job in the military translate to the civilian world?

Am I making a mistake?

After a little bit of speed texting to a good friend of mine (who happens to be a vet) and a lot of ranting, venting and…virtual hyperventilating, I realized,376292_3456229416747_707591486_n Leaving The Military: "So, What's Next?"

I don’t know what’s next. And it’s okay that I don’t.

So, even though I am giving the answer mentioned above, to every single person who asks me what I am going to do with my life after the military, I don’t exactly know what I want to do! I have so many passions and interests that maybe it’s time for me to explore those options. I mean, for the first time in five years, I won’t HAVE to set an alarm everyday. I won’t have to wear a uniform or do my hair. I don’t even have to run a brush through it if I don’t want to. I won’t have anyone telling me where to go and what to do and have to “follow orders.” Well, besides the orders that I am taking from the tiny dictators my husband and I have created.
376292_3456229416747_707591486_n Leaving The Military: "So, What's Next?"

For the first time in five years, I don’t have a plan. Nothing specific or set in stone. And as much as I LOVE to plan things out and plan my day (insert The Happy Planner) – do you know how freeing that is? I can take my time with things and not feel rushed.

My husband and I got married almost three years ago and ever since then, we have spent our weekends getting the laundry and housework done. Many meals were just quick and easy and not as healthy. We went out to eat (a lot) which we won’t be able to do as much when we’re broke (ha…ha…ha..). And we never got to go anywhere because we were too busy on the weekends just taking care of things in our home!

So, if I am going to sit here and talk about my plans for what’s next, I would have to say:

More weekend adventures with the family
Taking my kids to the park
Reading to my kids
Potty training my son
Doing the laundry throughout the week instead of letting it pile up until the weekend…
and putting it away sooner than three weeks from now.
Making healthier meals for the family
Actually CLEANING my house – not just picking up
Read books
Teach my kids things about life
Laugh with them, hug them, kiss them, and just BE WITH them

I spoke to another friend about my worries and she reminded me of one major thing:

People do this everyday.

She is so right. People DO do this everyday. There are people who never even joined the military and are doing this whole stay at home mom thing and are killin’ it! Everyone finds a way to make things work for them and their families. As much as I am afraid of making a mistake as a mother and a wife, I cannot dwell in it and feed the fears. I just need to embrace it.

One of the best things I ever did with my life was joining the Navy. I learned a lot, lived a lot, and fell in love. I matured and I gained so much more knowledge than I ever thought possible. I met the love of my life and started a beautiful family. I became a strong and more confident woman.

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And guess what? I joined the Navy wanting to do 20 years and retire…but did I KNOW what I was going to do with the rest of my life? With those 20 years? Nope. And I did just fine. Even better than fine.

Sometimes, we just need to remember that not everything is certain. But we can be certain to make an amazing life for ourselves with whatever comes our way.

So, what’s next?
We shall wait and see.

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The last day I would have to leave my kids to go to work. 4/4/17

Navy sponsored cruise to Hawaii. We made it!

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IYAOYAS @jackiemoonn @ayanabxtch @devilish_ways

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“You’re Killin’ Me Smalls”

b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"
Life is getting super hectic around here and not so routine.

Since going back to work at the end of February, there have been a ton of ups and downs when it comes to having a set schedule. I went back to work, had to take a class that involved learning about transitioning out of the military, going back on leave for a couple weeks, then back to work. For me, consistency AND routine is key to me staying sane.

Oh man, it’s going to be hard for me when I am no longer in the Navy and I become a stay-at-home mom!! There’s no way I’m going to be able to come up with some sort of routine while I have two little ones at home! I mean, I came face to face with that realization while I was on maternity leave for about 18 weeks. But I figured it was just because I had a new baby at home…I could be very wrong. It could simple be because I have two littles to take care of instead of one! Not only that, I have never been a SAHM, yet, so I know things will change once I realize I am not going back to work.

b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"
One of the things that might keep me a little more sane is the fact that I am realling starting to get into writing again. I have a few projects lined up for me that I plan to take on and hopefully excel in. Maybe writing will be something I can set up as a schedule? Maybe post at the same time every week. Post two times a week? It’s definitely something I can look into.

I just want to make sure I don’t go crazy while I am transitioning from the working/military mom to the stay at home mom life. I am not going to sit here and thing life is going to be a breeze. I know there will be hard times. As much as I loved working, I hated being away from my kids. As much as I hate being away from my kids, working was a nice break sometimes. There are some mothers that totally ROCK at either one of these lifestyles and I am just not one of them. Who knows, I might end up going out and getting another job down the line. It could be something I am totally passionate about. But in the meantime, I am good with staying at home with my babies.

On another note, I thought I would mention these adorable shirts (and onesie) that we are wearing! It’s not everyday that we get to be matching, happy, and clean all at the same time! Well, my daughter wasn’t overly happy but she wasn’t crying, so there’s that! Anyway, these are totally adorable and I loved that we could match, without looking exactly the same. Plus, it’s quite comical. In case you don’t know where this is from, let me help you out.

If you haven’t seen this movie….go find it and watch it. This movie coined that phrase and thanks to moms all over, we have been able to turn this phrase into a #momlife slogan. And we love it.

My friend Heather created these and she’s starting to create more for her shop and it’s so exciting. She hasn’t yet released THIS option but I am excited to share it with everyone. Heather is also an amazing photographer (she didn’t take THESE photos but she’s done a bit of photography for our family in the past) so be sure to check out her photography and all of her other work!!

CLICK ON THE LINKS BELOW!
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b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"

b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"

b29b217c-2bfe-40c5-911b-53a532ca0764 "You're Killin' Me Smalls"

Pregnancy Woes and Worries

10403521_1032432426773288_7872237651078672316_n Pregnancy Woes and Worries

Alright, it’s getting close to GAME TIME. No, I am not talking about the Super Bowl on Sunday. The Packers aren’t playing, so who cares anyway? 😛

February 27th (my due date) is fast approaching and I am feeling a bit of anxiety.

I went to the OB yesterday and found that I am 1cm dialated, baby is head down, and he is estimated to weigh about 5.5-6 lbs right now. No big deal…I could be at 1cm for the next 4 weeks and I would be fine, I’m sure. But the issue here is…

my husband will be leaving on a detachment on February 5th-13th.

Sure. It’s only an 8 day detachment but he’s leaving RIGHT before the due date and with my family history, I just have a feeling I am going to have this baby while he’s gone. 🙁

I know, I know. It was my choice to join the military as it was his and we knew what was involved with it. There are MANY moms that go through this alone and their husbands are gone on DEPLOYMENT. I totally get it. But that doesn’t mean I am more settled because there’s a chance my husband might miss the birth. Especially when it’s NOT a deployment.

Sometimes, you just get screwed, hard, and there’s nothing you can really do about it. It truly sucks.

I’m just having a few panicky moments here and there when it comes to this. I mean, my best friend leaves on Friday and goes off to spend the next 3 years or so in Jacksonville and I won’t be able to call her to come pick me up if I go into labor. Anyone else I could call? They live right by the hospital and it would be crazy for me to have them drive from out there, over to me and then BACK to the hospital! That would just take so much time! Ambulance? Yeah, there’s a different system for things like that considering I live on base. And our base doesn’t do deliveries in their hospital anymore…if they did, I would drive my happy ass the whole 3 minutes there.

I know. I have been lucky. My husband has been around for the entire pregnancy. He’s been able to help me around the house when I needed it, helped with the nursery, lifted things I couldn’t, etc. But honestly? If I have our little boy while he’s gone, I would trade the entire 9 months of my husband being home for him to be there for the birth. I’m not the only one disappointed about it…my husband is really upset that he’s leaving.

Especially since he is leaving the command in A MONTH. UGH.

Anyway…my random rant is over. Let’s just hope our baby boy likes staying in there and won’t come out until Daddy comes home! Just hold out until Valentine’s Day little man! Your Daddy wants to meet you on your first day here! You can do it!!

10403521_1032432426773288_7872237651078672316_n Pregnancy Woes and Worries

10403521_1032432426773288_7872237651078672316_n Pregnancy Woes and Worries

10403521_1032432426773288_7872237651078672316_n Pregnancy Woes and Worries